by Barbara Ann Rose

Dear BAR,

My boyfriend is a theater snob. He won't go to the theater unless it has perfect sound, perfect seats and a huge screen. We both love movies but I'm not picky about my movie-going experience. Sure, I like the big screens and stadium seating, but just going out, being with him and seeing a movie is enough for me. But he won't hear of it. What do I do?

Signed Fed Up with the Snob

Dear Fed Up, What's a nice girl like you doing with a boyfriend who's a snob. Where's your pride? I can only see two possible solutions to your problem. Either get rid of the 'nose in the air' or move to a place where they have state-of-the-art theaters. Oh yes, you could win the lotto and build your own. Does that sound like a feasible solution? ------ Proletarianly yours, BAR

Dear BAR,

My date wants me to go to all these gory movies like Bringing Out the Dead. I'd rather be watching an endless loop of The Big Chill but I'm afraid that's out of the question (if I want to keep dating, that is). Help me!

Dear Help Me,

So, what's so great about dating? Actually, though, I doubt you have to give it up. You just have to give up dating this one particular person. There are probably hundreds of other people who have an appreciation for The Big Chill (obviously one of the best movies of all time). Or, you could compromise (compromise is a good thing in a relationship) and settle on seeing something like The Sixth Sense, which would probably not offend your 'senses' but which also has a lot of 'dead' people in it. ------ Chillingly yours, BAR

CineScene 1999